Lost In A Melody
Something has also changed in that fan-to-artist dynamic: those roles are just being enacted, not genuinely inhabited.

An amazing new piece from The Quietus on Rihanna, her new album Unapologetic, the 777 plane tour, the difference between real engagement and soulless brands and that duet with Chris Brown.

Click here to read. 

Do you know what Rihanna? If you can’t be bothered to record engaging vocals, interesting melodies or any decent songs for your new album, then I can’t be bothered to properly deconstruct it and talk about the cheap and messy production/mixing, or the unnecessary and embarrassing features or the disgusting lyrics that plague almost every song and play on the fact that you were physically assaulted in a car by your ex boyfriend who also appears on a fucking track doing a terrible Michael Jackson impression whilst singing about how much he wants to keep fucking you, despite the fact that he’s obviously fucking someone else and you’re busy lamenting on another track that you hope “love doesn’t strike twice” as though that was some clever play on words when in fact all it does is conjure up horrific images like this in our heads.
In fact Rihanna, seeing as though you more or less dumped a steaming shit into a CD case and handed it over, my official verdict for Unapologetic will simply be the word “shit” repeated seven times.

Is this video about Chris Brown? It feels like everything Rihanna does these days is about Chris Brown. Hmm.

William Orbit, master of underwater wooshy noises, has done a remix of Chris Brown’s new single Don’t Wake Me Up. It is beautiful. Listen above.

Chris Brown needs another massive pop single if he’s going to sell any copies of his already delayed album Fortune and he’s hoping that Don’t Wake Me Up will be just that. I remain a bit skeptical, but then again I absolutely loved Turn Up The Music and never thought it would climb as high as it did in the UK, so who knows? It does have all the right ingredients - cool autotune and an epic beat (wrongly attributed to David Guetta). We shall see. It’s always unexpected when it comes to Chris, after all.

Some Stuff To Talk About…

Robbie Williams wants a “gaby" (a gay baby), but says that if he has a boy he will teach him to play football. Not sure what this has to do with anything, but I bet Lloyd Daniels doesn’t play football.

Leona Lewis would like to experiment on her next album. Which probably means it will either be Rated R Part 2 or will be all be a bit more like Outta My Head. I know which I’d prefer.

Ne-Yo is trying to get Gaga to do a country song with him. Good luck with that.

Calvin Harris doesn’t like Chris Brown anymore. Does he have a point? Let’s compare and contrast. Personally I think it’s nitpicking.

Tinie Tempah explains some of the lyrics on his debut album. I’ll save you from wasting your time - he doesn’t explain “risk it for a chocolate biscuit” :-(

Finally, I’m just including this because I thought it said “sex change” and it made me laugh.